Want to Know How Much I Care About the Harry Potter Saga Ending?

I care thiiiiiiiiiiiis much:

I, for one, am excited the saga of Happy Potter has come to an end.  Granted, I have a special level of hate for Harry Potter because we share the same last name.

To give you some context, one day when I was deathly ill in college, I went to the campus health clinic (where they gave you a pregnancy and mono test every time regardless of your symptoms)  and as I was sniffling my way through the intake nurse’s questions, she gleefully asked “Potter?  Are you related to Harry Potter?”

Yes, moron!  I’m related to a fictional literary character who is a wizard.  Now take my chart and go find me someone who can actually give me some drugs!

This has been the story of my life since 1997.  Every bank teller, customer service rep, and receptionist has had a joke for me for 14 years, and assumed they were the first person to think of such a witty connection.  So, adios Harry Potter.  I don’t know how the book/movie ended, and I don’t care.  But if I wrote the ending, it would have included a fiery death.

Moving on…